Easing into the New Year

Man! Hard to believe that the holidays that we planned and planned for has already come and gone. We had such a nice little break from reality together that I was kind of dreading joining the real world this week.
BUT...
Honestly, it's been pretty great. I didn't realize how much I missed my routine, spending just intentional time with my kiddos, getting the small things done around here. Taking time away from all that gave me a bit of perspective I think. 
My life is sweet. 
I say this not to invoke jealousy in anyone or to act as though I'm better (which I'm totally, totally not), but because it is just SWEET.
I forget that. I forget that often. I'm so grateful to be refreshed so I can come back to my life and feel truly thankful for what it contains. God has been gentle to nudge me towards contentment, and that has been a HUGE challenge to me throughout my life. I will not declare victory in this area, but I will declare victory over yesterday! ...let's not get crazy
As we embark on this foster care journey, I know that there will be things that I will be giving up....activities, free time, just the busy-ness of life. Parts of me have felt nervous about that.
Will I still feel connected to all of my friends if I have to spend more time at home?
Will I still feel purposeful by serving mostly in my own home?
Will I be enough? Will my life be enough?
But, God is so gracious to me. He has been showing me this week that HE is enough, and that's all that matters. Through the games of candy land, reading the millionth story of the day, getting the dishes done, and getting a precious smile from my girls I felt full. I felt full because I felt thankful, and I remained mindful of the Giver of good gifts. 
I want to hold fast to this joy. To grip it so hard and experience it each and every day. 
But I know me, and I know my human nature. I know the struggle I go through to find contentment, how I often look in each and every other nook and cranny to find it before realizing it's been here all along. I know I will stumble and fall again and again.
But today I want to say thank you. I'm thankful for my family, for the job I've been given here in my home, for the small but growing business that God has been faithful to provide for, for the adoption journey and all that has entailed.